[x]

Graduation DayGraduation Day:

They told us we would be alright...

We had fought with honour and won our titles.

We had overcome trials together -

Watching dozens of our siblings fall in the line of duty.

For this they had promised us, a wondrous welcome;

A bountiful world of adventure, with a myriad of paths.

All this, they said, awaited us in the stone cities.

Large metropolises, where the working folk resided...

There were hundreds of us, who made that journey.

Walking miles across the scorching desert,

Clinging to a hope of the fortunes beyond.

Yet what awaited us was not a promised land -

Nor was it a life based on the merit we had earned.

I wish...I wish I was a monster
So I could be kind
And break the stereotypes.

I wish I was colored
So I could respect people
And break the stereotypes.

I wish I was a man
So I could be kind to women
And break the stereotypes.

I wish I had male friends
So we could all be..
Just friends
And break the stereotypes.

I wish I had autism
So I could prove that autism,
Does NOT mean "dumb".
And I could break the stereotypes.

I wish I could change the world.
But sometimes, you can't break a stereotype.

Only stereotypes, can break you.

Lingerhow can i move forward,
when the fingerprints of my insecurities
are still lingering within my chest,
pressing against my ribs like piano keys?
i am just waiting, for the day,
when the saddest parts of me
are overcome with songs of serenity.

Pretty Blue PillsPretty blue pills,
shiny in my palm,
the ticket to my peace,
to my eternal calm.

They're so perfectly round,
and soon they'll be in me.
The closest to perfect
that I'll ever be.

They go down so smooth.
Five, ten, fifteen and twenty.
Soon I'll be gone.
Twenty-five and Thirty.

That should be enough,
but I'll play it safe.
Thirty-five and forty.
Now I have no more to take.

The bottle is empty,
as empty as I feel.
None of this is happening,
too good to be real.

But soon I start to drift
into a dark unknown fog.
Somewhere quite distantly.
I hear a muffled sob.

But I blow it off as fake.
Nobody could possibly care.
I doubt anyone's noticed
th

You don't just die.Do you understand?
The blade against your wrist
Doesn't just slice your skin.
It cuts through others
Hearts
Souls
And sanity.

Do you understand?
You don't just kill yourself.
You kill everyone.
Everyone dies
Everyone cries
Everyone suffers
From YOUR goodbyes.

Do you understand?
You don't just die.
You take everyone down
With you.

PhantomWhen life
or fate
or whatever it is
that puts things together
and takes them apart...
when It
amputated you,
it left me
with a phantom
limb
and you are still attached
to my body
when I dance
and make love
alone

ten ways this breakup isn't meant for the movies1.
you go out for twelve eggs and come back
with half a dozen and a new girlfriend.
you hold the eggs out to me like
six dead birds is enough of a peace offering.

2.
i push the eggs out of your hand and stay
with my hand over your heart as i watch them
fall. if they do not hit the ground, this is all a dream.

3.
the eggs smash on the tile and splatter
on the cherry wood cabinets, newly installed
that cost me two paychecks.

3.
the egg whites hit your leather shoes that
you’ve worn for two months straight
because you think they make you look more sophisticated.

3.
the egg whites hit the fridge halfway up, barely touching
the moose mag

Dear friend,You have to understand, dear
The reason to why I run.
I run away from reality
From the lungs that cannot
Take anymore smoke
From the heart that threatens to
Stop...
I run away because
I'm a coward
Because I'm afraid of life
Afraid to care or love.
I'm afraid that every time
I'm glad it blows up in my face
And that every time I smile
I shed a million more tears.
That's why I run, dear
You have to understand.
I was destined to be a fighter but
I don't want to fight anymore.
I was destined to be a warrior
But how am I supposed to win when
The war I fight is against life itself?
I know that I always blow everything up but-
I keep stepping on mines, dear...
...I keep stepping on mines...

ellipsisshe goes to sleep
clawing at her chest with pinpoint accuracy
for an emptiness she can’t describe,
but hates all the same. tomorrow

she will write a letter: “dear boy,
i always wanted to be somebody’s
flowery poem, but the verses carved in my arms
are riddled with ugly clichés. & you are why

i don’t sleep through the night. if
we were a language, i was the
subordinating conjunction, you were

the punctuation.

i remember you in staccato
conclusions, solemn absences
of goodbye”

brain squealsI beat depressions in the earth
for my brain squeals and waves
that burst in my wet ears
until something makes me drown.
I will. (again) V.

Virginia,

put rocks in pockets
and walk right in --
I'll drink your overcoat
until your throat weeps
and your soaked hair
weighs you down.

I promise.

with love,
Ouse.

P.S.
brain squeals are from cold sweats
sleep well.

TearsI am not afraid to cry.

I am not afraid for you to see the tears

My tears.

Don’t tell me I have no heart.

Don’t tell me I have no soul.

For without them I could not cry.

You may not see my tears but they are there.

I have learned to let myself cry for the things I’ve loved,

For the things I’ve lost.

They are silent tears, but they are mine.

So let me cry.

Let me show you I have a heart.

Let the things that touch my heart be shown through my tears.

I am not afraid to cry.

I am notI’m not your little boy.
You’re not my little girl.
I’m just someone you met,
And wants to change the world
I’m not the prince in your dreams
I don’t have smarts or might
I’m just the one that screams
And cries to sleep at night
I’m not who you want me to be.
I will never be what you are.
I’m myself, I am free.
I’m not ashamed of my scars
I’m not that weak
You’re not that strong
You still have company
But I’m still alone
So I speak
Though this poem.
It’s not a pretty love song
I’m just saying what pains me, explaining what’s going on.
Because I am not perfect,
I’m not retarded,
I’m just like you,
Broken Hearted
Never forget,
There is always a reason to be
And I won’t regret
I’m always happy to be me.

combatantI.
it strikes me
that this woman
could be a palace.

I marvel at
the opulent dome of
her brow, her arch
expression—

skin like a courtyard of
ivory tiles,
a thousand intersecting
golden lines about her
head and neck.

she beams from atop her
sunlit tower,
beatific and beautiful,

spreads her arms like
open doors,
invites you to be one of

the many
who have wandered her
lavish halls.

II.
I’ve often thought
of myself
as a castle:

all rough-hewn stone
and turrets,
a temper like molten
tar.

my head is crowned
with
embattled parapets,

weapons readied
at the crenels.

I look out from my
guerites, my brattices,
eyes like arrow-slits

Second ShadowThe hand on your shoulder
The whispers in your mind
The words on your tongue
The voice in your throat
And the feelings in your soul

To drive to madness
To seduce the insane
To draw the blood
And dull the senses
To plague the memories
Of damage done
To fake safe haven
As the character changes

Light the anger and fuel the rage
Another mind to feed
A second shadow
To take you into eternity

Remnants

Hold on to my sanity every single day
I’m not gonna fall.
Those hungry, greedy holes you left
They start calling.

Just like a cold-blooded murderer
You use every heart you can find
When will you ever be satisfied?

You destroy everything you build
and tear everyone you love
Just to die and start over again.
Replay, replay, replay...
Until you grow weaker, and weaker.

You never destroyed me.
I destroyed myself to forget you.
I die every day in an endless cycle,
The rotating remnants of revolting hearts.

Just like water, I choke and swallow.
I mirror your mind, your thoughts, and your desire
And just like Narcissus, you fall deeper and

Browse More Like This

Download File
HTML, 1.4 KB more ▶

More from ~XxXSammySuicideXxX

the player-3-flash backI skipped school and went to the park I hadn't meant to break down that was the first time I cried sense the incident
I closed my eyes my mind going back to a time I didn't want to remember

~~flash back~~

"Oh my god Destin!" Shane cried "guess what"
She was jumping up and down with excitement I looked up at me twin from where I sat on my bed
"It's a girl" I asked
"What? No!" she mumbled
"Of course" I sighed "it's a boy"
"What? No! Shut up Destin" she laughed "Seth asked me out"
My eyes widened and I whispered
"What"
"Yeah isn't this great" she squealed "I got to get ready for the party tonight"
She went up the steers I stud there

Is it Okay?Is it okay?
Okay to feel the tears
That soak your cheeks
And make you shake
Like an earth quake

Is it okay?
Okay to break down
To fall to your knees
And cry and cry
Until your shaking like a leaf

Is it okay?
Okay to break
To sob and shake
And hate the world
For every mistake

Is it okay?
Okay to feel alone
To feel lost
And unloved
Like the worlds out to get you

Is it okay?
To not be okay

My faultdon't worry ill be fine
I'm not crying
there's something in my eye
don't fool your self
You didn't hurt me
I have to go before it rains
There's a storm on the way
Cant you tell
Now turn before I cry
don't worry I'm fine
Its not your fault
No I'm not lying
Now go away
don't speak to me
Its all my fault
For trying to help
I was stupid I was dumb
that's ok you've won
I wont try I've lost all hope
Ill leave it to the people you care about

The dark gameI try my best to never break
I try my best to stay awake
But as the days roll by
I find it hard to stay alive

I see a darkness
That calls my name
It has a game
It wants to play

The point is death
The player is him
The darkest shadow
There's ever been

If you fear
Then he will win
If you fight
The game never ends

He made the game
He picked the rules
You cant win this game
Don't be a fool

Final DanceTake my hand
And we will dance
Across the world
Are final chance

Take my hand
and hold it tight
We'll move and glide
We'll fight and stride

don't fear
What will happen after
Just take my hand
And dance a little faster

Right now is all that matters
The dance is moving faster and faster
don't worry about what happened after
Are final dance is all that matters

My sharp friendHold him to the light
And see if he will shine
Tell him all my secrets
And no that they'll be fine
Trust him with my life
Hold him nice and tight
Twirl him in my fingers
And no he'll be here every night
I don't fear that he'll be angry
With anything I say
He'll always be there for me
No matter what the day
He's cold and shiny
But he takes away the pain
He's my friend no matter what you say
Think that I am pathetic
Think that I am weak
Laugh at all my pain
And clap at my defeat
I don't need your words
And I don't need your respect
All I want in life is to be left rest

View Gallery · View Prints

Featured in Groups:

#TheUnheardVoices
The unheard speak up.

#writers-central
Pens are mightier than swords.

#PoetsandWriters
Authors of all things Lit.

#AuthorsEscape
escape to a world of writing~

#The-Poetry-Cafe
Poetry and Writers Welcome!

#Poets-Refuge
Poetry Poem Refuge Poets-Refuge

#VIVAPoets

#Stars-Moons-Poems

Show all (13)

Details

Submitted: June 9, 2012
File Size: 1.4 KB

Link

Thumb

Statistics

Comments: 6
Favourites: 5 [who?]
Views: 77 (0 today)
Downloads: 4 (0 today)

[x]

hate love

by ~XxXSammySuicideXxX, Jun 9, 2012, 10:34:08 AM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

I love you

                 Don't lie

I love you

                 Don't speak

I love you

                 Re-think

I love you

                 Re-speak

I hate you

                 No lie

I hate you

                  Louder

I hate you

                  Re-think

I hate you

                  Re-speak

I hate you

                    that's no lie

hate loveby ~XxXSammySuicideXxX

Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

yeah

~96-Me-Hatter-10 Jun 15, 2012 Hobbyist Traditional Artist

Wow. But it's a poem.

~XxXSammySuicideXxX Jun 16, 2012 Writer

yeah so?

~96-Me-Hatter-10 Jun 16, 2012 Hobbyist Traditional Artist

Sorry. I meant to continue that comment. It's amazing how you wrote it, but it's very sad. Sorry if I offended you.

~XxXSammySuicideXxX Jun 16, 2012 Writer

no no of course not your comment just confused me I'm sorry if it sounded rude

~96-Me-Hatter-10 Jun 16, 2012 Hobbyist Traditional Artist

No. It's okay.

~invaderzimfan234 Jun 9, 2012

yeah....

More from ~XxXSammySuicideXxX

Featured in Groups:

Details

Statistics

hate love

hate loveby ~XxXSammySuicideXxX

The Journal Portal

Polls

What is your preferred drawing software?

deviantART [dee·vee·un'nt·ART]

Keep in Touch!

Deviousness

Add Media

Style